Sunday, April 20, 2008

One Last Trip to Ceres

I have less about an hour before it's not the weekend any more, so to keep my promise to all four of you who read this, you're getting part one of my story, tonight.

Normally, there won't be anything you have to read before reading something I've written, but, see, I wrote this whole page of exposition that didn't really fit in the story. So, rather than delete the whole thing, I wanted to post it. It's a little background on the universe this story takes place in.

One other disclaimer: this story is in its raw form. I did very little re-writing. I wanted it that way because I want to hear your feedback in the comments. Remember what I said in my first post? Well, whether you like it or don't, tell me why. Help me get better.

Here's a little bit of exposition..

Since the completion of the International Space Station in 2010, the governmental space agencies of the world had made great strides in space exploration. Private spaceflight was also booming and proved to be an industry that was quite lucrative for those involved, whether they contracted to government agencies or focused on the private sector. In fact, it was probably more successful than the government programs.

The great success of private spaceflight was accompanied, shortly after, by crime and piracy. While that can be a story in and of itself, needless to say, private and government vessels were soon armed to protect themselves in the depths of interplanetary space.

In the years of exploration, trade and turmoil, considered to be the Golden Age of human spaceflight, Earth’s governments recognized the need for ships that could defend themselves and other vessels, continue exploration, and supply its outlying facilities. A substantial fleet was built that could do all of those things. The vanguard of the old Fleet, the Challenger, was the last of its generation. Challenger was one part explorer, one part work horse and one part defender. Those who served aboard her were regarded as world heroes.

Nearly one hundred years since the last piece of the ISS was locked into place, after this age of exploration and excitement, the world’s space programs had stranded themselves on a plateau. Budgets were being cut. Interest was waning. Those stationed on Earth’s outposts in orbit, on the moon and the few facilities even further out in the Solar system, wondered what their fate would be.

It wasn’t as bad as everyone thought. It wasn’t good, either. Most of the “inner core” facilities would be maintained. The cutbacks only really affected Earth’s small fleet of exploration vessels and those outposts in the far reaches of the system.

At this point, the Mars Science Platform was dismantled. Old, large ships of the past were being decommissioned and sold off to make way for smaller, cheaper single-mission vessels. The government was re-tooling its role in space to focus on defense, and leave exploration up to private companies. It seemed to make sense and it was cheaper. All that remained was the evacuation of Ceres Base in the asteroid belt so it could be sold to a private company.

Due to miscommunication in schedules for the decommissioning of old ships and the completion of new ships, Earth endured a period where private ships, contracted by the government, were the lifeline to Ceres.

Because it was the most prestigious vessel, Challenger was saved from sharing the fate of its sister ships. A private foundation raised the money to turn it into a museum, to preserve that age which seemed to be fading away. While the ship had not been turned into a museum, yet, it had been dry-docked for over a year. Some would consider this an honor. A tribute to the past. Others, though, thought it was an insult to an Old Dame who still had a lot left to give.

So, if that interests you, and you wonder what could possibly happen in a universe like that, click here and read the first part of my crappy little story.


Part II will follow sometime soon.

2 comments:

smurfthumper said...

I'm already semi-acquainted with the world--or, at least, with another project (the same project?) that shares some of this project's characters. It may be that this is the first of those "introductions" it was suggested you write for us so that our brains could better distinguish these characters from their pop-re[f/v]erent antecedents.

Dissertation work makes it harder than it usually is to give any kind of real critique of it. That won't keep me from contributing my usual brand of uselessness, however.

* * *

Stuff:

Ewan raised his glass of amber liquid to his lips while his doughy cheek rested on his
hand.


That's a whole lot of "his."

The first conversation (between Ewan and Dak) reads like that bit of Broadway dialog immediately preceding a breaking out into song.

I noticed your narrator waffling between a dry relation of events and being overly "chummy" with the reader. Deciding on the tone you wish to set with your narrator will depend on how you decide to proceed.

The nine pages feel very much like the first nine pages of the first book of a "seek out new worlds" star-hopping series. If that's what you want, you're headed in the right direction. If you're trying to avoid that, you're going to need to amp down the "brash new"-ishness of Wellington and the familiar playfulness of the "grizzled old hand"/"new kid" Dak/Ewan relationship.

That said, I'm interested to see where you go with this.

HG

Unknown said...

Hi I think you are doing a better job of making your characters sound like themselves Watch out you dont make the girls too masculine though I really like Ewan--he already seems young and vulnerable Reg better not turn out to be JeanLuc Jr.!!!(HAHA) I'm looking forward to part deux!!